Man thinks “Let’s go, Brandon” is for him

Florida school thinks vaccinated students are icky

Man can’t understand why the actor from “TJ Hooker” going into space was a big deal

Llama revolt shuts down MMW News

Wyoming school may change ass-related mascot

Citizen's arrest! Flood of legislation inspired by Texas abortion law

Superstars stop flushing the toilet

Cyber Ninja’s audit: Al Gore won in 2000

46-year-old preps for 2024 Olympics

New 97-team super conference forms

QAnon followers believe Olympics already happened

Guest Editorial: Why I love the filibuster, by Sen. Joe Manchin

Just Headlines

Four-thirds of Americans struggle with fractions

Ohio legislator misses key vote for lack of ID

Space X hampered by movie cliches

Cicadas: “You people suck. We’re going back under.”

“How many Toby Keith songs can you sing?” and other questions Georgia election officials can ask

Wisconsin tow truck driver vows to help stuck ship

Researcher exploring the link between diabetes and racism

Kansas stunner: School has football program

Ted Cruz vows to restore Mr. Potato Head’s penis

A history of fleeing

Steve King hopes to advise Marjorie Taylor Greene on what to do with her spare time

Wally snubbed my MLB Hall of Fame

Trump's ten greatest accomplishments

Trump fails to pardon Iowan’s parking ticket

MAGA supporter oversleeps, misses Capitol insurrection

Ghana sending peacekeeping troops to U.S.

Maryland Sec. of State saddened that Trump didn’t shake him down

Man distraught that things still suck in 2021

MMW Classic: Dork army makes huge advance

Larry the Cable Guy's erudite turn

Trump musical not at all based on “Hamilton”

Giuliani’s hairdresser speaks out

Other states sue Texas for being too Texas-y

“Don’t keep them eyeballs” and other notes from America’s creepiest motel

South Dakota man aroused by Covid test

Invisible ink discovered on turkey pardon document

Just Headlines

"Queen's Gambit" controversy reaches new lows

Dead Philadelphia voter supported Trump

Donald Trump accidentally sues himself

Norway’s election disruption operation goes unnoticed

Dad upset by son's abstinence

Kristen Welker keeps the mute button

Forever 21 Months, for mature fashionistas who wish they were babies

MMW News Classic: MLB's impotency faker

Haunted house goes out of business. “I can’t compete with reality,” owner says.

Man calls 911 about missing highlighter