
- 6 days ago
10-year-old still looking for Easter egg
Wichita, KS—A month after Caden Moore’s parents hid a dozen colored eggs around their two-story Wichita home for Easter, he is still on...

- May 4
They did what?
A recent ABC News/Washington Post poll, conducted in states which have enacted strict abortion laws since 2020, found that 44 percent of...

- Apr 22
You, too, could be a murderous dictator
Earlier this week, a Tennessee state senator provided a motivating example for those experiencing homelessness: Adolph Hitler. During a...

- Apr 5
Donald Trump reveals perfect NCAA bracket
The Free State of Mar-A-Lago—At a press conference Tuesday morning, former President Donald Trump claimed to have filled out a perfect...

- Mar 28
Nobody at Oscars saw Will Smith slap Chris Rock
By Becca Grace Winthrop, MMW Hollywood correspondent LOS ANGELES—The entertainment world was set on its ear Sunday night when during the...

- Mar 27
Unused question from the KBJ hearings
WASHINGTON DC—On the final day of Supreme Court hearings for Judge Kentaji Brown Jackson, a MMW News Service reporter, posing as a...

- Mar 12
Faygo pulls out of Russia
The list of corporations ceasing operations in Russia grew Friday afternoon when Faygo announced it would no longer distribute its...

- Feb 22
Children’s author irked his book isn’t banned
St. Charles, Mo.—Nick Cameron’s debut book has sold reasonably well the past year though it hasn’t been a huge success. The children’s...

- Feb 7
Rep. Whatshisname can’t remember that thing
Attorneys for embattled Congressman Jeff Fortenberry of Nebraska introduced a novel defense Friday in Fortenberry’s ongoing legal woes...

- Feb 4
Skittles now have personalities
Wrigley announced Friday that its iconic brand of round candies, Skittles, will now have unique personalities. In an effort to keep up...

- Jan 7
Pope encourages more ‘bunga bunga’
VATICAN—A day after calling childless couples selfish, Pope Francis encouraged married couples to have sex in order to become parents....

- Dec 30, 2021
Overlooked stories of 2021
It’s that time of year (end) again when all media outlets publish their “best of…” lists. But instead of looking back at a bunch of stuff...

- Dec 24, 2021
Labor shortage throws Santa’s ride into doubt
North Pole—Santa Claus announced Thursday that he can no longer guarantee children’s presents will arrive on Christmas Day amid an...

- Dec 1, 2021
Rampaging turkeys captured, spree ends
Manchester, NH—A pair of extremely wild turkeys, recently pardoned by President Joe Biden, were captured Tuesday morning, ending a...

- Nov 5, 2021
Man thinks “Let’s go, Brandon” is for him
Garden City, Kan.—Brandon Lynn has had a little extra pep in his step the past few days. Ever since the 35-year-old learned of a...

- Oct 22, 2021
Florida school thinks vaccinated students are icky
MIAMI—Centner Academy, a private elementary school in Miami, made national news this week when it announced that any student who gets...

- Oct 14, 2021
Man can’t understand why the actor from “TJ Hooker” going into space was a big deal
Rural Texas—Craig Anderson just doesn’t get it. Anderson, 52, ascended into space Wednesday on board Jeff Bezos’ Blue Origin along with...

- Sep 30, 2021
Llama revolt shuts down MMW News
MMW WORLD HEADQUARTERS—As astute readers have noticed, Mike Malloy Writer News Service has been silent recently. Allow us to explain. Our...

- Sep 10, 2021
Wyoming school may change ass-related mascot
Anderson, Wy.—The controversy about high school mascots has arrived in this rural Wyoming hamlet. While the rest of nation wrestles with...

- Sep 1, 2021
Citizen's arrest! Flood of legislation inspired by Texas abortion law
On Wednesday, the U.S. Supreme Court declined to intervene in a Texas law that would allow private citizens to enforce a ban on abortions...