

Steve King hopes to advise Marjorie Taylor Greene on what to do with her spare time
Kiron, Iowa—Steve King has found new purpose. After many dark nights of the soul, King, the former Republican representative from Iowa,...
Feb 7, 2021


Wally snubbed my MLB Hall of Fame
Boston—No person was elected to the Major League Baseball Hall of Fame Tuesday, and no creature either. The legendary Wally the Green...
Jan 27, 2021


Trump's ten greatest accomplishments
The staff at MMW News Service spent the past month interviewing journalists, scholars, presidential historians, and politicians to review...
Jan 21, 2021


Trump fails to pardon Iowan’s parking ticket
Algona, Ia.—As the world tried to make sense of the dizzying number of pardons outgoing President Donald Trump issued Tuesday, one...
Jan 19, 2021


MAGA supporter oversleeps, misses Capitol insurrection
Comer, Geo.—Like much of the nation, Randy Billingham watched the Jan. 6 attack on the U.S. Capitol in horror, though for a different...
Jan 17, 2021


Ghana sending peacekeeping troops to U.S.
Accra, Ghana—After Wednesday’s attempted insurrection at the U.S. Capitol, Ghanaian President Nana Akufo-Addo announced he would send...
Jan 7, 2021


Maryland Sec. of State saddened that Trump didn’t shake him down
Annapolis, MD—Days after audio of a phone call between President Donald Trump and the Georgia Secretary of State, his counterpart in...
Jan 6, 2021


Man distraught that things still suck in 2021
Tokyo—It’s going to be a long flight home for Clark Pilger. Pilger was so eager to turn the page on 2020 that the Muncie, Ind. native...
Jan 1, 2021


MMW Classic: Dork army makes huge advance
As part of our award-losing series MMW Classic, we look back at some of the stories that made us what we are, like this 2003 story about...
Dec 27, 2020


Larry the Cable Guy's erudite turn
Lincoln, Ne.—“Git-R-Done” is gone. Comedian Dan Whitney, previously known as Larry the Cable Guy, is rebranding the character Lawrence...
Dec 22, 2020


Trump musical not at all based on “Hamilton”
New York—Playwright Chuck Caldwell insists that his new musical “Trump” is in no way a rip-off of Lin-Manuel Miranda’s “Hamilton”. “I...
Dec 19, 2020


Giuliani’s hairdresser speaks out
New York—Don’t blame Tyrell. Hair stylist to the stars Tyrell “Typhoon” Middleton said he is not responsible for the recent...
Dec 14, 2020


Other states sue Texas for being too Texas-y
Washington, DC—Responding to a lawsuit brought by Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton, several states filed suit against the Lone Star...
Dec 10, 2020


“Don’t keep them eyeballs” and other notes from America’s creepiest motel
Meservey, Iowa—Despite a struggling economy and numerous code violations, Irv and Erma’s Roadside Inn in north Iowa soldiers on. Owner...
Dec 7, 2020


South Dakota man aroused by Covid test
Mitchell, SD—For virtually every person, the test for Covid-19 is ranges from mildly unpleasant to 10-second torture. Not Bill Fletcher....
Dec 2, 2020


Invisible ink discovered on turkey pardon document
Washington DC—This is one big flap. In one of the few traditions President Donald Trump hasn’t upended, he issued pardons Sunday to two...
Nov 22, 2020


Just Headlines
One-line stories for the on-the-go reader and the lazy writer Man regrets farting on office chair after it becomes sentient Coup at...
Nov 21, 2020


"Queen's Gambit" controversy reaches new lows
Lausanne, Switzerland--The continued back-and-forth between the head of the International Chess Federation and several other entities...
Nov 18, 2020


Dead Philadelphia voter supported Trump
Philadelphia and the Great Beyond—Keith Munson is livid. The late Munson said he proudly voted for President Donald Trump in last week’s...
Nov 10, 2020


Donald Trump accidentally sues himself
Washington DC—Amid a slew of litigation filed Thursday, President Donald Trump sued himself. One of the 347 lawsuits filed by the...
Nov 5, 2020