Just Headlines

One-line stories for the on-the-go reader and the lazy writer


Man regrets farting on office chair after it becomes sentient


Coup at Minnesota dog pound leaves workers leashed, begging for kibble


Liberal in Iowa dreams of someday living in a blue state like Georgia


Rudy Giuliani didn’t realize staffer was kidding about dyeing his hair via Sharpie


Wyoming still a state


Russian hackers fired after forgetting date of U.S. election


Stylist offering socially distant haircuts by attaching 2 x 4s to garden shears


Rudy Giuliani didn’t realize staffer was kidding when she said “Good job”


Vice-President Pence tries brown sugar in oatmeal, feels guilty


Student keeps leaving dictionary open to page that contains “butt”


St. Louis woman having a great 2020 just keeps it to herself


“Gone With the Wind 2: Give a Damn” begins filming


Justices haze Amy Coney Barrett by making her read Brown V Board of Education

opinion after chugging a bottle of Jagermeister


Trump digs secret bunker under the Rose Garden; tells Eric, Don Jr., “there’s only room enough for one of you”


Rudy Giuliani didn’t realize

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