By Donald Trump
My fellow Americans. It’s Your favorite President of ALL TIME – and soon to be again, we’re working on it, trust me – here to tell you about an Absolute Travesty going on in the NFL. The fake news liberal media will try to tell you that the Kansas City Chiefs are 3-4. LIES!
The Chiefs are my favorite team. I’ve always had a great relationship with the state of Kansas. I won there twice; biggest margin in the history people tell me. Great people in Kansas. The best. I love going there to visit the places and the things, so I can’t stand by and let people Ruin the Chiefs’ reputation with a bunch of vicious false lies that are not true!
Let’s go game-by-game. The first “loss” was to Baltimore, a miserable city run by crooked Democrats. The Chiefs were ahead 35-24 so I switched over to watch the debut of “America’s Most Bangable News Anchor” on OAN – great show by the way. Tremendous. Then I come back to the game and suddenly the Chiefs are losing 36-35. Where’d all these points come from? Touchdowns, field goals, all these points just out of nowhere. Nobody knows where they came from or how they got added in the middle of the night.
Next the Chiefs totally beat the Rams, but the Rams claim they won 30-24. I called [NFL Commissioner] Roger [Goodell] and I said, “Roger, come on, we all know KC won, everybody knows it, everybody. So just find them, like, seven more points. Seven, that’s all. Just say you reviewed the game and found one lousy touchdown that was missed. Come on, Roger, you know I’m right.”
But it gets worse. Two weeks later, Buffalo – there’s a real loser town if there ever was one – says they beat the Chiefs. I looked into it and all the referees, every one of them, voted for Hillary. AND the scoreboard at the stadium was hacked by Hugo Chavez and George Soros. Rudy said they found a cord – a big blue cord – made in Venezuela, that would switch the Points. It switched the Points! So whenever the Chiefs scored it would give the points to the Bills. You can’t make this stuff up!
But the biggest lie of all was this past Sunday. The failing New York Times and the rest of the Democrat media are telling you that KC lost 27-3 to Tennessee. Three points? Come on, you’re embarrassing yourselves. The Chiefs have the best offense, some say ever, in the History of the NFL. There’s no way they could only score three points. That’s about as likely as me losing Arizona. Personally, I don’t think that game ever happened. They just made it up.
So let’s make this clear. The Kansas City Chiefs are one of the best teams in football, actually, the best, EVER. I am declaring them 7-0 and furthermore, I am giving them the Super Bowl for all the pain and suffering. The Chiefs are champions! Just like they have been the last 12 years in a row.