Norway’s election disruption operation goes unnoticed

Oslo—Deep inside an undisclosed location in Norway’s capital, the mood was grim Wednesday. Despite their best efforts at political espionage, a group of scammers decided to end their attempts to disrupt the American election.

“The Russians are so good at it, and they don’t have as good of schools as we do,” Njorl Kristakken said. “I just thought it would be so easy, and fun.”

The group, all men in their early 20s with IT jobs and little else going on, tried to engage in disinformation campaigns similar to those that have been perpetrated by Russia, Iran, and other countries. First, they set up a Facebook page under the name “Vikings for Biden” and hoped to portray the former American vice-president as a bloodthirsty conqueror. The page received 973 friend requests in the first day.

“We thought we’d hit the…what do they say in your casinos? Jackpot? Yes, jackpot, but then we noticed all of the people were from Minnesota,” Per Oostenhousen Kyitch said. “We tried to steer the conversation to violent insurrection if Trump wins but all they wanted to talk about was if Kirk Cousins was better than Teddy Bridgewater. We thought maybe they were politicians but they play football.”

“I thought Americans didn’t like football,” said a bewildered Nels Andersen Frederiksen Larsen.

“No, not our football. The one that’s bad for brains,” Oostenhousen Kyitch replied.

Next, the men decided to start a Twitter account with the handle @BidenIsAryan. It spewed racist statements and jokes designed to make Biden look bad but after a month the account had just 19 followers.

“We got 10 Klansmen, five sex bots, two from some company promising us great rates on car insurance, a Lutheran Church in Vermont telling us the love was the answer, and Congressman Steve King,” Narg Lofven Mofven Vofven Johnson said.

Finally, an Instagram account was created that would show fake photos of Donald Trump, buff, riding horseback, and beating up Antifa members. Hours later, the account was hacked and group member’s bank account and credit card numbers were published online.

“We think it was the Russians,” Oostenhousen Kyitch said.

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